It can be a challenge to work as a professional software engineer, not only due to tight deadlines and difficult learning curves but also from a mental health standpoint. Many programmers report high-stress levels, difficulty sleeping or relaxing, and are prone to feeling like an impostor, which often leads to anxiety, burnout, or depression. Having gone through this difficulty, I'm often asked what was the key to my recovery. There is no one-size-fits-all solution, but I do have 10 tips that can help to keep people healthy and on the right track. These tips are written with software engineers in mind, but everyone can benefit from them.

Do What You Enjoy

To begin with, I am a firm believer in doing what you love professionally. Every profession has its share of people who are unhappy at their employment but stay because of the money, the hours, or the status. However, in the long term, this just leads to irritation and mental tiredness. Begin your road to greater mental well-being at work by asking yourself, "Do I truly love this?" If the answer is no, go do something else. Life is too brief.

And if you find yourself thinking, "Yes, but...", read F**k It. Do What You Love, by John C. Parkin. He'll convince you that if you're not doing what you love, you'll never be happy.

Be Truthful to Yourself

We all need to start being honest with ourselves sooner or later (although sooner is preferable). Often, the truth is there in front of us. Maybe it's our spouse who has been telling us for years that we work too much, or maybe it's the buddy who keeps asking "Are you sure you're alright?". Dealing with mental health issues begins with being entirely, even brutally honest with oneself. Look in the mirror, let go of your ego, and ask yourself, "Am I happy? Do I enjoy my job? "Do I enjoy my life?" The understanding that the answer may be "no" is frequently the point at which individuals "break," or shed their veneer and begin to be honest.

It's difficult, to be sure because this is also the point at which things begin to deteriorate (because of your increased awareness) before they begin to improve. Still, admitting you need to change is an essential first step.

Pay Attention to Your Body

Many people who are stuck in an environment they don't like or who are under a lot of stress don't even know it. They just keep going and ignore the warning signs until it's too late, whether it's a sense of work ethic, personal pride, or financial worry. Health difficulties frequently emerge at this age. When we are anxious or stressed, our bodies release cortisol, adrenaline, and noradrenaline. This is a good and natural response, but chronic stress hormone buildup causes physical disorders such as chronic pain (headaches, back pain), digestive difficulties (heartburn, constipation), inflammation (skin rashes, intestinal problems), and even heart conditions.

This is your body's way of saying, "I've had enough," and you'll have to listen to it sooner or later, or your health problems will worsen. I've had it happen to me and seen it happen to others. For example, a former colleague of mine who suffers from anxiety and fear of failure went to a dozen doctors over a few years with an ever-growing list of problems. She tried a variety of therapies and went on medical leave for weeks until she just couldn't go on. She then resigned.

Attend Therapy Sessions

When you need change, you also need aid. People's feeling of pride or obligation, which caused them to become stressed in the first place, frequently interferes with their rehabilitation. Admitting you need to change is one thing; admitting you need support is quite another. But it's such a crucial factor. We're all so wrapped up in our particular settings that we can't often see the forest for the trees. Whether it's a psychiatrist, a therapist, or just a close friend, they frequently see truths and answers when you just see problems and obstacles. Treatment, ideally professional help, is tremendously beneficial at all phases of mental illness, whether it is a hazy sensation of boredom or a full-blown clinical depression.

Anger Control

Anger is a good indicator of underlying fear, and it is often ignored or controlled for years. This is another area where many people cling to societal norms or the idea of moral superiority. "I'm not furious, I'm simply (insert another feeling here)," people will tell you. They'll admit to being unhappy, disappointed, upset, and so on, but scratch the surface and you'll find a lot of rage. Anger for that colleague who constantly criticizes their code, anger for that manager who has no concept how complicated a new feature is, anger for themselves since they've been working on an issue all day and haven't made any progress...

Dread lurks behind the anger: fear of the confrontation with said coworker, fear of losing your job, fear of failing. Another significant step is admitting your anger and finding a good outlet for it.

Confront Your Fears

When it comes to dealing with mental health difficulties, things may quickly become frightening. Admitting you have a problem is difficult, seeking treatment is scary, and talking about your emotions is dangerous - suddenly you feel very little. That, though, is a positive thing. If there's one thing I've learned from my healing journey, it's how much fear rules our lives. There are three basic sorts of fear: fear of abandonment fear of change and fear of failure - and combined they constitute the source of many of our unpleasant feelings and ideas. The final category, in particular, appears to be quite prevalent in software engineering.

Fear of failure fueled my imposter syndrome, anxiety, crippling perfectionism, social communication challenges, sleep trouble, and lack of work-life balance. Facing your anxieties, knowing where they originate from, recognizing the impact they have on your physical and mental well-being, and finally learning how to turn them into strength is the key to progress.

Say No

Recognizing your anxieties and fury will quickly lead to the identification of several sore places in your work life. You'll suddenly discover how much some people, events, or actions irritate you, and there'll be no turning back. Whereas in the past you would just avoid colleague A or B as much as possible, you will gradually begin confronting them. Or, when you might have merely gone along with the choice to embrace the latest framework, you'll want to speak up now. This is when you learn to say no, which is another social and professional shame nowadays.

You'll often hear that excellent employees have a Yes mindset, but I believe that being able to say no at the correct moment is a greatly undervalued ability. Saying no is an act of assertiveness, showing personal limits, and demonstrating self-respect.

Get Rid of Your Storyteller

People who work in software or other technological fields are frequently very reasonable. Many people will have a strong inner monologue in which they analyze flaws, question judgments, double-check solutions, imagine worst-case situations, and so on. This is your narrator, and his tone isn't always nice. For some people, like myself, this inner monologue may become unrelenting and devastating, with us second-guessing ourselves at every turn. Eliminating your storyteller is a difficult assignment for logical individuals working in a sensible atmosphere. Going out of your thoughts requires getting into your body and listening to your gut instincts. This may appear ethereal and mystical, yet it is quite practical. It's about putting your thoughts on hold and focusing on the present moment.

For example, rather than replaying an unsuccessful debugging session ("What did I miss? "Am I ever going to identify the problem?"), you need to concentrate on that gnawing feeling in your gut, which is where all of your failure dread lives. This is also unpleasant, but at least it offers you something to work with. It's far simpler to attempt to push the fear out of my body than it is to halt the creaking cartwheel of my thoughts...

Ignore the Context

When you become conscious of your storyteller, you will realize how much of your life is governed by words, ideas, and scenarios. But if you pull all of that "background" away, things are pretty clear, fairly quickly. Consider the following professional issue in context: "It's true colleague A belittled me yesterday, but I did make a terrible mistake, didn't I? He can't still talk to me that way. Okay, I realize there's no malice here, and he's had a difficult year with COVID and all. So, how should I proceed? I'm probably putting gasoline on the fire if I go to the management. "Perhaps I'm overreacting?" And the list goes on...

Stop Reading Lists Like This One

I have a confession to make after this list. I don't believe in lists like this one, or in a slew of suggestions and tactics for difficult issues like enhancing mental health in the workplace. So here's my final piece of advice. Seek counseling and begin working on yourself if you are facing mental challenges (personal or professional). Books, podcasts, and apps can all assist, but genuine transformation comes through hard effort. The type that comes from gazing hard in the mirror and working on yourself, rather than from a book. And, while it's difficult to work — possibly one of the most difficult things you'll ever do - it's well worth it.